Monday, 17 November 2008

HIV is very boring

Some people have asked me why I do not keep up this blog much theses days
Well the reality is that living with HIV is just so very boring!!

I don't mean I want to live my life in a state of anxiety and trauma whereby HIV is uppermost on my mind and I am constantly distressed about it

No .............what I mean is that now we have got used to the fact we are living with HIV, there is often nothing to write about as our HIV is just a fact of our life.

But it also carries for me has its own unique sense of boredom because in the past I have always been a believer that life always changes and that you never know what is going to happen and what your future will bring. And I have always been happy and excited to face whatever life has in store for me.

But the one thing in my life that will never change now and will always be constant, is living with HIV - and the prospect of that bores me stiff.

I do not know if anyone will understand what I mean by this or why it is this way for me, but it just is.

I had an idea that this is how I would feel once I got used to he fact of living with HIV, so this is one reason I have tried to get involved with the HIV issue as an activist and have joined groups, a charity and started a woman's group.

But it is hard to be an activist on your own, never meeting anyone else who feels the same face to face - and so rairly meeting anyone else with the remotest interest in HIV from any point of view!!

I had hoped that I could use my new status and knowledge about HIV to raise awareness and inform and threw myself into distributing the PozFem stuff and contacting those I new from my youth work days and offered my services everywhere I could think of as a public speaker on HIV.

But no one is remotely interested!!!

That is something I have learned - that unless you have HIV most have little or any interest in it, and those of us who do have it get bored with it being a constant in our lives.

And very few are at all interested in finding out .

I guess like I felt before HIV ...

Everyone thinks that HIV will NEVER affect them personally, it will never be directly a part of their lives. Some are sorry that others suffer it but it is of no real interest to them!

I have tried to get some enthusiasm to do something for World AIDs Day or to join in with someone who is doing something down here for Worlds AIDs Day

But have found no enthusiasm to do anything and the only thing that I know that has been organised in this part of Cornwall is a party run by

Healthy Gay Cornwall - a health promotion initiative

Saturday, November 29, 2008
8:00pm - 11:55pm
Bar Q-Dos, Truro

This is great - that someone is doing something. And I am going to go if I can - But I am not gay or even male but I will go to support.

their statement on the facebook page says: HIV still disproportionately affects gay and bisexual men in the UK. It is estimated that across the UK, around 1 in 20 of gay/bisexual men are now HIV positive - a third of those don't even know they are infected.

And I am not even male !! I am a lo older that most will be and theses days i can' cope with crowds or crowded nightclubs - So how am I going to feel if I go? Will I stick out like a sore thumb? Probably!

I am not sure anyway I agree with the statement. It is probably true that there are more gay and bisexual men in the UK that are HIV positive than other groups ( but not totally sure about this now) and that like the rest of the population a third do not know they are infected - but I thought this applied to the whole population of the UK and not just gay and bi men!!- well know it does -

Also I thought that HIV new diagnosis/infection rates had stabilized or even dropped among gay men and he fastest rising group of new infections of HIV are women in the UK??

I am sure that this is right?
( if anyone knows what the statistics are let me know ?)

Anyway what i really want is a job in HIV in some way - but as far as I can see their is no chance down here in Cornwall unless I moved it would be impossible!

If anyone knows of any jobs in HIV or related work in Cornwall let me know!! I need something to keep me interested and motivated.


apostle said...


is being proven by the more than 400 individuals who have taken a dose of 60 ml three times daily for 21 days. The result is that AMBUSH 'KILLS' the virus by causing the protein envelope to rupture and the viral particles are discarded by the white blood cells. AMBUSH is able to 'KILL' the virus that are 'hiding' in the lymph system by its 'natural radioactive' properties. This process allows the body to 'return to normal health' with a corresponding immunity to that or those strains of the virus.

What is AMBUSH ?
AMBUSH is a radioactive isotope of uranium that is found in the 'palm' plant of which there are more than 3000 species. When ingested, AMBUSH causes the body temperature in the trunk area to rise to about 102 degrees when the individual is sleeping. The preparation takes four hours per batch, which is then given to the individuals for consumption 60 ml three times daily for 21 days. AMBUSH is a herbal preparation in this form but it contains an active ingredient which is a 'NEW' crystalline substance, a drug from the 'palm plant' similarly to ASPIRIN originating from the willow tree bark

After 21 days on AMBUSH, ALL the individuals experienced a decrease in viral load to undetectable, an increase in cd4, increase in RBC, an improvement in general health such as more color to the face, decrease in Buffalo hump, an increase in gluteal muscles, a decrease to having no joint pains whereby individuals can bend to touch their toes, and walk up steps are but a few examples. There is also a dramatic increase in their sexual appetite beginning after the first week of therapy

In any plant concoction such as percolated 'tea', there are 30-40,000 compounds, whi ch would take the scientific community twenty years to isolate one particular ingredient if they knew what they were looking for. The LORD GOD has given me seven steps to isolate the active ingredient, which is soft and metallic in nature and has a carbon- uranium-sulfur-(classified)-phentolamine configuration or structure. This is similar to Federick Kekule and the discovery of the benzene ring where he dreamt the structure.

As an antiviral and 'natural radioactivity' producing agent, AMBUSH is also effective against leukemia, lupus and HPV. Here I am saying that I have 'GIVEN' AMBUSH in the same 'strength' and dosage to patients with leukemia, lupus and HPV. A 35 year old male with HIV found it difficult to impossible to urinate was put on 'green tea' and water while the doctors contemplated prostrate surgery. One of the doctors gave him my number , I sent him a supply of AMBUSH an d he has not been given any more ARV's, since taking AMBUSH 18 months ago, is in 'good' health and has expressed a willingness to be examined by HIV investigators like many others who have taken AMBUSH.

I have sent this 'IDEA' to most HIV research agencies, scientist of the field, universities, hospitals, clinics, politicians and news agencies to which it is REJECTED because the name of THE LORD GOD is mentioned. He has steered me scientifically through the processes such as which plant and how to produce the active ingredient. What are the odds of a Florida Pharmacist picking a plant would contain the CURE for HIV/AIDS ?
I have never charged any of the people for their supply of AMBUSH but a life saving has been spent on the project with NO renumeration from any sources because AMBUSH falls outside the walls of modern medicine and research.


My proposal is that I PROVE that AMBUSH CURES HIV/AIDS by giving it to a number of END-STAGE or DRUG-RESISTANT people and the scientific community watches their recovery. This proposal addresses the problem in that I have already outlaid the results to be obtained.

This IDEA is unconventional in that the scientific community has rejected AMBUSH because I say it is GOD given. Secondly if I wrote it according to certain standards, then it might be peer reviewed. However, THE LORD GOD has also shown me that there are five enzyme systems associated with the virus, reverse transcriptase, protease, fusion and two more of which causes the virus to be AIRBOURNE. This means that without DIVINE intervention mankind and ALL warm- blooded mammals will be extinct in a number of years.

The PROOF of what I am saying is found in scientific papers wherein it is found that when the protease cuts the viral strands, it cuts it at DIFFERENT lengths EVERY time, to which it should always be a valine at the end but is a different amino acid every time. This is why it is IMPOSSIBLE to produce a VACCINE.

Since this is NOT a hypothesis but there are about 400 individuals who have taken AMBUSH, here lies a vast area in which to check, recheck and confirm that AMBUSH CURES AIDS. Let it be mentioned that during the HIV reproductive cycle, reverse transcriptase converts viral RNA into DNA compatible to human genetic materials. Thus the human DNA has been 'hijacked' and since each person has a DIFFERENT DNA, then the new viral copy is unique to that person which shows that each individual has a DIFFERENT STRAIN of the virus. Consider two HIV positive people swapping viral strains and increasing its complexity with multiple partners.
It can also be proposed that they be revisited as proof that the strain or strains that they had were 'killed' at the time of taking AMBUSH considering that a person can catch as many different strains as there are people who are infected by HIV.
I am also willing to work with the scientific community in identifying those individuals who took AMBUSH and wish to be identified with this process notwithstanding that some are stigmatized while others are jubilant,

Once AMBUSH is verified as being able to accomplish that which is aforementioned then the next stage might be the natural and artificial synthesis of the substance.

Finally, if this is accepted or not, believed or not, THE LORD GOD always wins and this is the heavenly truth to which AMBUSH was divinely given to mankind for the CURE of HIV/AIDS and it will be here forever. Apostle Shada Mishe.

Here is a video taped presentation that I gave at t he Martin Luther King library in Washington

Veritee said...

Oh so that's right is it?

SO I give up the hugely researched, tried and tested Antiretroviral meds that work so well to keep me well and take this rubbish thing called AMBUSH

Are you mad or are you evil?

Do you have HIV?? Or is your sole purpose of posting such rubbish on my blog to try to make money out of those of us who are unfortunate top suffer from HIV???
And especially those who are unfortunate enough not to live in a country that provides them with effective medication or live in a country that they have to pay for it and can not afford it ?

If so you are the worst of the worst

You are a vulture!!!!!

AMBUSH a cure!!! Well if it was you would be worth millions and would not have to post rubbish like this on my blog

Basically FUCK OFF!!!!

Anonymous said...

Does the lord find an appropraite and reasonable amount of bad language acceptable Apostle? If not he may find what I have to say to you quite upsetting.

Who the hell do you think you are googling HIV/Aids to pick out innocent victims to spout your bullshit at? If there is a god out there I hope he answers my prayer that you will come back and read this. I dread to think of the people you may have contacted in this way, and those at such a vulnerable stage in their lives that may have actually taken your shit and contacted you.

I suggest to you sir that you come back when your fucked up ideas have been licensed for use on HIV patients in the UK by our governing bodies. And may the lord you so clearly trust in damn you if you have caused any innocent people to believe your fucked up logic and put trust in you.

Your Sincerely

Helen aka WG